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Letter to the Editors
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Dear Editors,
My name is Jessica "Autumn" Bernkopf, and I am writing because I feel as if my relationship with Alexis Jolly was misrepresented in Alexis Jolly's summer column, Dartmouth Alumnae With Whom I've Had Sex. Typically I would express my feelings through interpretative dance (please see aforementioned article), but I broke my video camera while spelunking in the lava tubes last weekend.
I wanted to clarify the definition of "sex." Alexis told me his interpretation of sex was brainstorming ways to be ironic while living in Los Angeles. And I was only happy to oblige since I am considering becoming a born again virgin given all of the recent drama with my ex-boyfriend, Grant. The best part about sex with Alexis is that I never was tempted to go beyond Alexis's interpretation of the act.
This is not to say that Alexis isn't an interesting guy. I fully support his goal to embody the "List of Stuff White People Like." He has most of them down (No. 1 - coffee, No. 10 - Wes Anderson movies, and No. 111- pea coats), and I tried to help him improve his grasp of No. 107- "self aware hip hop references" - given his career aspirations. I think I could have helped him too if he didn't leave the yurt after one week to head back to Los Angeles to check off No. 51 and No. 63 (living by the water and expensive sandwiches, respectively).
Despite the miscommunication, I wish Alexis the best, and I continue to pursue my own study of irony at the yurt. And I don't mean the fact that I just received a check and a Lily Pulitzer bikini from my parents in Greenwich.
Sincerely,
Jessica Bernkopf '05
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